Bittersweet, and Not of the Chocolate Variety

I have made a few changes in my life aside from eating Paleo, some of which I will not reveal just yet. However, the most recent change is the “Big Move” back into Mom and Dad’s. Living alone is one of my most cherished experiences. I’m a natural introvert, so after full days of extroverting – part of the job description – I’m desperate for alone time. Time to gather my thoughts, to decompress from the day, and (from what I’ve learned during this Paleo reset) to live in the healing process of solitude. Therefore, deciding to move in with other people (no matter who those other people are) came after a long time of discernment. This has been “part of my plan” for the past few months, and the day has finally arrived. I moved most of my things last weekend, as I was away the past few days, so I’ve been living here for a while. But today was the day that I turned in my keys. Today was the day that I let go of what some people call “freedom” or “adulthood” (I know I have not lost either, but living on one’s own is a tangible realization of these ideals). As I returned to my new/old home, my mom asked me: “Are you sad?” And I turned to her to say, “I’m too tired to be sad.” After a few hours of rest, I can finally admit that… I am sad. I’m not sad because I “have” to live with my parents again. I’m not sad because I went from a one-bedroom apartment to a very tiny bedroom. I’m not sad because I downsized from a queen to a full bed (there’s a huge difference when you’re used to keeping most of your wardrobe on the other half… don’t judge). I’m sad because turning in my keys meant that I closed another chapter in my life. How I’ve learned to live is no longer my routine. Change is tough for everyone, even if it’s motivated by excitement and new possibilities. So right now, in this moment, I am sad.

On the flip-side, I am so very grateful for such supportive parents. The moment I asked if I could move back in, they began making plans for clearing out the spare bedroom for me. They spent their free time helping me transition as quickly and as comfortably as possible. So if you want to ask me: “Is moving back in with your parents a good thing?” My answer is yes. Now that I have begun working on my physical and emotional health, it’s time to get my finances in order. I remain as happy as I’ve been the past 30+ days, living with no regrets from the decisions that I’ve made. To come full circle, today is bittersweet.

You must also be interested in my Reintroduction Phase. I have reintroduced a few things at this point: milk to go with one cup of coffee per day, rice, and non-mixed adult beverages. I wasn’t feeling my best with the reintroduction of adult beverages, so I will be taking that out again for a while (too much, too soon). Perhaps I need some more balance… like carbs. Otherwise, it’s exciting yet difficult to think about what I want to reintroduce next. Bread… or maybe cheese. We’ll see what I feel like eating on Wednesday. 3 days is much easier to grasp than 30, that’s for sure. As I reintroduce more and more foods, I’ll let you know how it changes my energy level. I’ve had a long and exhausting weekend, so I don’t think that my observations are completely accurate right now. So for now…

Sláinte! (with water, of course)

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